The "B" Word

After a week of overcast skies, the sun has come out. It's October, and we still haven't had snow yet. It's a miracle, really. I haven't gone outside all day today, and I'm perfectly all right with that. I'm listening to Nick Drake, and yet, I don't feel depressed – another miracle in its own right.

After my (un)usual Thursday slump, I went out to the Trapper on Friday. My boyfriend and I hung out with a few friends, and went over to a friend's house afterward. It was a fun-filled night of relaxing, and I even allowed myself to get a nice buzz. (You have to understand that I go to the bar maybe a total of five times a year.)

(I have to insert this here – I had deleted the sentence with that “b” word over and over before finally letting it go. The “b” word being “boyfriend.” I don't want to jinx myself. Here's a guy who knows my little insecurities, who just makes me smile, who I just want to reach out and hold, who hasn't run away after witnessing my neuroses. This blog was originally started because of him – although he was just a friend then, a friend who was a great comfort to me during my times of irrational distress. I don't think he reads this blog anymore, but that's all right. And if he does, he'll just have confirmed what he already knows – that what he is to me defies any label. We bicker all the time, and we seem to have nothing in common. However, that's just an external assessment, in my opinion. The core of it is that he's someone I know will never hurt me, someone who sees something in me that no one else has done. And that's more than enough.)

Back to the sunshine-filled evening. Here are pictures from this afternoon, of the view from my deck (of the sky clearing – it's actually completely clear now, an hour after the photo was taken) and of my cat lounging in a square of sunlight: