Sunday, March 16, 2008

The answer

The answer is “I don’t know.”

And these are the questions:
Are you going to stay in Inuvik?
Are you leaving?
Are you heading back to school?
What might you study?
Really?
Are you getting out of teaching?
What are you going to do with all your stuff when you move?
Where are you moving to?

I’m going to bask in the glory of uncertainty for a while longer yet. A week from now, I’ll be on the beach in Cabo for spring break, and I don’t want to think about it before then. I also don’t want to think about it then. I just want to feel the sun on my skin, to clear my mind of the gnawing questions, and just live in those perfect moments of sand and sea.

And here’s the view from my living room, out beyond the deck. I wanted to capture everything: the blinding sun in the arctic crystalline air of mid-March, the bare branches that would fill with greenery overnight in a few months' time, the way the light danced on the coloured beads of this little star ornament made by my “Inuvik big sister,” whom I missed dearly. For in that moment, that precious, perfect gem of a moment, I knew the answers would come to me in time.

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