Friday, January 16, 2009

Ailing

I think I've made myself sick. When I was doing my first undergrad degree all those years ago, I would routinely get the flu during exam period. This past semester, the bug managed to steer clear of me; however, it has found me now, and in the time it has taken to search me out, it has grown into a giant that is capable of knocking me out.

I swear that it's psychosomatic. I'm sick now because I'm stressing myself out over every little thing. And I'm helpless because I've done all I can, botched things up along the way, and cannot do anything to fix them. (I'm talking about my grad school applications here -- yes, still -- but I won't go into great detail other than saying that there is one further complication that I've brought on myself that might delay my going to grad school for a year.)

My mother took this week off, and had a "staycation," where she stayed at home and relaxed. I used to love staying up in Inuvik for spring break, to read and write and walk the town without any apparent purpose. Today, Mom and I went out for lunch at a Korean restaurant that I had never been to. That seafood pancake and the chicken stew were to die for! My favourite part of any Korean meal is the little plates of complimentary appetizers, and this restaurant certainly did not disappoint.

After lunch, I went shopping, although I needed absolutely nothing. Bought an expensive sweater, and I could imagine the wrath of my conscience, the little voice in my head telling me that I didn't need it and couldn't really afford it. But, the rational part of me was napping and trying to recover from the flu bug, so the beautiful sweater is hanging in my closet now, awaiting a special occasion.

And I hear that it might actually be warmer up in Inuvik than here in Vancouver right now. That's just not right! On the bright side, the mounds of snow along the roads are almost gone. I can imagine myself going on walks to and from the library, to and from the pool, to and from the nearby lake, and to and from nowhere in particular....

But first, let me battle with this giant of a flu bug and kick its nasty butt. And let the applications work out, or else let me accept that I have to wait another year. Maybe I'm meant to do and learn something amazing in the meantime.

* Here's another photo of my kitty, Duncan. I was going to go out to take some potentially amazing pictures, but both the weather and my own constitution did not allow it.

1 comment:

  1. Hope you're feeling better now, that you've won the "battle"! It seems like you're getting it all together, and are going after what you want!

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